Hannah Montana

There’s a long history of rock stars with personae. David Bowie had Ziggy Stardust and Eminem had Slim Shady. But a new, young star named Miley Cyrus, with her alter ego Hannah Montana, is the first to combine this sort of maneuver with the youth, beauty and innocence that has launched stars like Britney Spears and Jessica Simpson.Recently, Cyrus has been in the news for some nude photos (that didn’t show any nudity) of her that were published in Vanity Fair. But Devan and Amanda have a completely unrelated concern about Miley Cyrus: her fans, or better yet, their parents, are completely insane.

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Dialogue

Devan: So, what is all this craze over Hannah Montana?
Amanda: A.K.A. Miley Cyrus?
Devan: Yes.
Amanda: It’s crazy, right?
Devan: I’ve like never…There’s people fighting at Christmas time for her dolls because they sold out. There were moms punching each other in the face at Walmart and stuff trying to get her dolls.
Amanda: The behavior of the parents to get their kids hooked up with the toys or the concert tickets. It’s crazy.
Devan: Did you hear about the mother who lied for her child so that she could get the tickets for her concert? There was a concert…You had to write an essay, “Why do you want to meet Hannah Montana?”
Amanda: I’m scared to ask what the lie was.
Devan: She said that her father…She wrote it as a six-year-old, the mother did, and said, “My daddy died in Iraq,” which wasn’t true, and she won the contest and a reporter dug it up, found out it wasn’t true and they revoked her prize.
Amanda: OK, that’s just wrong. And that’s how desperate parents get. But Miley Cyrus, she’s a teenager. She’s the daughter of Billy Ray Cyrus, kind of a one-hit wonder, no offense, in the whole country realm, and here he’s put his teenage daughter out on a television show, on tours…
Devan: Oh yeah, she’s way more successful than her dad ever was.
Amanda: Absolutely. And the whole thing, the whole schtick is she’s Hannah Montana blonde and Miley Cyrus brunette and that’s the whole thing. Two in one package. And my kid, who is five, is absolutely obsessed with her. So the market is girls and boys.
Devan: Well, step aside, Britney Spears!
Amanda: No doubt.

Discussion
Devan has noticed that Hannah Montana is really popular right now. Last Christmas, parents fought in stores over Hannah Montana dolls to give to their kids.But the worst yet is one woman who wrote a letter pretending to be her six-year-old daughter and claiming that her father had been killed in the Iraq war so that she could meet Hannah Montana. A reporter investigated the story and discovered it was a lie.Amanda’s five-year-old son likes Hannah Montana too and she explains to Devan that Miley Cyrus only becomes Hannah Montana when she’s blonde.If you had a musical alter ego, what would it be?

Grammar Point
That’s not a mistake. “Personae” is the plural of “persona,” not “personas.” Isn’t that weird? Other words that do that are formula (formulae) and antenna (antennae).

Quiz
How can you tell when Miley is Miley and when she's Hannah?
By her costume.
By her hair color.
By her makeup.

Why are some of Miley's fans upset right now?
The don't like Hannah Montana.
They couldn't buy her doll because they were sold out.
She appeared naked in a magazine.

What caused women to punch each other in Walmart?
Arguing about who's better, Miley or Britney.
A limited supply of Hannah Montana dolls.
A lie about a soldier in Iraq. ...